Pretty yarn I dyed. It’s purple, red, orange, and light orangy/pink. It cost me a whole $3 for 100g of mercerized wool(it won’t felt). I’m super excited.
Me at the Calgary Zoo at about 2pm. It was too fricken hot! Cool elephant statue though!
Packing for Calgary
Im leaving for Calgary at 4am today. I’ll be back monday night. Im excited, i haven’t been to Calgary in years. And i get to go to the Zoo! I’ll be posting pictures on here!
Even More Sad
So I finally had enough of Curtis being weird and decided to call him on it. Short version is that he doesn’t feel he is ready to get married and when I asked him if he still even wanted to be engaged to me he went silent. At that point I set my ring on his chest, told him that he should do some thinking and left.
That was at about 1 this afternoon. I can’t believe he didn’t try and stop me from leaving. I had asked him if he still loved me and he said yes, so then I asked him if he wanted to be with me and he said yes. He just doesn’t want to marry me I guess. I have been crying like crazy and getting sick to my stomach. I think he has broken my heart. I’ve never felt anything like this. I don’t know if we are together or anything even. He hasn’t said anything to me. I just hope he knows that if he decides he doesn’t want to be with me he will never have me back. I don’t believe in ‘taking breaks.’ If it’s over, it’s over for good. I hope he will realize he just has cold feet or something though because I still love him like crazy.
Edit Just thought i would say that Curtis and i got everything figured out. He got freaked out when Jacqui started talking about house/kids/marriage. We are still engaged but arn’t activly planning a wedding.
Sad
I am depressed. Curtis has been acting weird lately and I finally figured out why. Curtis talks in his sleep and last night while he was asleep he said “I don’t want to marry you.”
At that point I woke him up and asked him what he was dreaming about and told him what I heard him say. He could see that I was upset and he grabbed me and gave me little kisses. Except that he has this way of kissing me when I’m upset and he doesn’t want to talk about whatever I’m upset about because he is going to make me more upset and that’s how he kissed me. That told me right there that he doesn’t want to marry me.
So now I don’t know what to do. I feel sick to my stomach and keep crying.
So i decided to start a blog
Well for whatever reason i decided to start a blog. I haven’t had a blog really. I’ve had Livejournal, but i could never manage to actually update it more than a couple of times a year. But, i figured that with my iphone and a tumblr app i could do some daily blogging. Chances are it will be mostly about my knitting but that is fine. Who doesn’t like knitting?
Well, curtis is here to get me so i should go for now. Blog later!
Christine
